The Backstory
by Sakudragon
Summary: I'm writing this because I'm a journalist and all the short stories I've written, all the advice columns I've done for people and to help people; none of them have done anything to stop the thoughts, to quell the constant chatter in my head. I have always wondered if I wrote it all down, if people would read it all. Would it make it all better that someone somewhere understood?


The Backstory

"The sky looks freer than the ground that holds us, but you can never hold onto anything in the sky. The ground is what keeps us so close." ~ The guy who never had a say.

So here I am, typing away at my computer. What is the date? What is the time? I don't know those things, and really, I don't care. These past few months I have been in my own zone. Doing my own thing, living in my own thoughts; barely paying attention to what goes on around me. And sadly, barely talking to, or keeping in contact with any of my friends. I'd add family to that list too, but they are all dead. The first month of my mother's death which was two years ago; I did nothing except be mad at her. I screamed at all her pictures. I boxed away all her stuff. But really, after a while I realized that the person I was really mad at was myself. Like most people. At myself because I didn't see her the day it happened. At myself because the last time I saw her I told her exactly what was true. Even though it was true I knew it hurt her. But it had to be said, it had to be done, and I had to be the one to tell her. I don't regret saying it, I just felt bad that I did. And my father, I haven't seen him in two years. As far as I'm concerned he's dead. But the reason why I am the way I am happened before all that. All that stuff just added to it. The reason why I am the way I am is because of the first guy. And ended with the last guy.

Some things you guys might be wondering when you first start reading this are: What's her name? Why is she writing this? Why would this thing that we're reading hold our interest, or be of any use to us? Well before I continue I'm going to answer all those questions whether they popped into your head or not, and then some. My name is Sakura. My last name you all will not and do not need to know. I'm writing this because I'm a journalist and all the short stories I've written, all the advice columns I've done for people and to help people; none of them have done anything to stop the thoughts, to quell the constant chatter in my head. I have always wondered if I wrote it all down, if people would read it all. Would it make it all better that someone somewhere understood? I guess with this I'll find out.

This book is about my life. The last four years of it at least. And maybe a little bit before that. I'm twenty years old by the way. When I'm done with this book and it's published, and you people read it all... I want you guys to e-mail me. I want you guys to send me letters. All about what you think and if any of it helps you guys with your own problems. Because this is a real life story, about real life problems. About how a girl found out what it really meant to be careful for what you wish for.

*1) (Author's note.) I'm going to write this all as if it's happening just as you people are reading it. That way you people can get a better understanding, a better feel of it all.

*2) It might get confusing at times and it will have some time skips go around. You people will have to pay attention to it all.

*3) If there are any of these * in the pages that means that they are my own little author notes i added in at random times.

Book started on June 4, 2012

Chapter One

Page one.

The start of summer.

"Time does not stop for you or me. But I will wait for you until it stops me."

~ The boy whose smiles never extends to his eyes.

(Date: June 4, 2008 4:36 pm)

 _S_ ummer is always my favorite time of the year. The weather, the flowers, the cookouts, the water parks... What's not to like? But not everyone is like me and I accept that. But come on! How could Neji say that he hates it?! That's just something I will never understand. He said he likes NOTHING about it. Weirdo.

But anyway, we have all just graduated the tenth grade. Neji, Ino, Shikamaru, Sai, and myself. My best friends. I could never ask for anyone better then them. I'm so glad we all met around the beginning of high school. We've been through so much together, I don't know what I would do without them.

I'm wearing eyeliner with a light coat of mascara on my face. For my clothes, I'm wearing my favorite white dress with light green colored petals scattered on it. It's sleeveless and has a pale pink ribbon in the middle of it that ties in the back. I picked my two inch black heels that lace criss-cross three inches up my legs. My hair is tied half-up and half-down at the same time, with some short and long scattered curls around it. I have dangling half moon black earrings on with a silver charm bracelet on my right wrist. I've gotten one charm from my mother and one from my father every birthday since I was ten.

Today is not only a big day because of graduation, but also because today starts the beginning of what will be a wonderful summer! Looking to my right, I can see my friends coming my way after getting congratulated and saying goodbye to their parents. Mine already left ten minutes ago.

Ino is everything a person would call a natural beauty. She's been the only girl best friend that I've had. She can be a complete bitch at times, but that's just one more thing that I love about her; she doesn't take crap from anyone. Even though she can get any guy if she really wanted to. Because a good amount have asked her out. She's only had one boyfriend. They aren't together anymore, but so far he's the only one she's ever dated. Ino has on a black dress that fans out half-way down the dress, it's short sleeved with a purple belt she added to it. She's wearing light purple three-inch heels and her hair is in a french braid off more to the right side so that she could drape it over her right shoulder, with a black and purple butterfly clip at the end to keep it all together. I got it for her two years ago as a best friend gift. Her hair is so long that even when braided it reaches down to her lower back. She also has black and purple bangles going half-way up her elbow on her right arm. Her face has a light coat of black eyeliner, mascara and smoky purple eye shadow. Overall She looks beautiful.

Chapter One

Page Two.

Neji is so calm and quiet, but his looks are what keep the girls chasing after him. Something he and I both hate. I would love to see him with a girlfriend. She just has to like him for all the Awesomeness that he is, with or without his looks. But since neither one of us believes any of the girls around here are like that, he's been single for awhile now. For graduation he's wearing a white button down half-sleeve shirt with a pocket on the left breast. Black dress pants, the kind that would attract like fifty hairs if anyone else wore them. But somehow he manages to keep them hair-free and looking perfect. The pant legs just barely touch the tops of his black Italian leather shoes. Which I got him for his last birthday. His hair, so blonde that it almost looks white in the sun, comes halfway down his back and is tied off at the bottom. To finish off his most *dashing look,*(I tried not to laugh out loud when I thought that,) He has a black blazer on over his dress shirt with only the middle button done and the sleeves rolled half-way up.

Shikamaru, my fine sexy friend. He's a tad bit on the player side. But that just makes it so much more fun to mess with him. He has had more girlfriends than I can count on both my hands. And that's just since high school started. I always thought him and Ino would make a good couple, but when I brought it up a few times, and tried myself to hook them up a few times, they both made it painfully, and I do mean _Painfully_ obvious that they do not like each other that way. But I will go into details about that some other time. Maybe. Shikamaru actually took the time and energy to get dressed in something I'd like to call nice but sloppy. Whereas he would call "a waste of time" he has on a brown, long sleeve dress shirt. The top three buttons undone, with the shirt half-tucked. He has on black jeans, and I'm pleased to say with only a few wrinkles. Brown "dress sneaks" as he likes to call them. I have always called bullshit on that, but I have to admit that they do look good on him. He has on a silver choker-necklace with only one charm of a cloud on it. I got it for him last year when I was on vacation. His hair is short and has a just-rolled-out-of-bed messy look to it. Sometimes he puts it up in a ponytail, but most of the time it's down. And a denim jacket left open over his dress shirt.

Sai is the most artistic person I know. At sixteen he has already been accepted into college at the best art school in japan. Out of everyone he's like a brother to me. At one point people thought we were dating. At that same point I told people to fuck off. Sai has had two girlfriends, both of which I hated. But I never said anything because I wanted him to see how horrible the girls were on his own. Which both times he did in the end. Sai's wearing a dark blue, long sleeve shirt that has snaps instead of buttons on it. It's super silky to the touch and has two pockets in the front. He has white dress pants that hang one inch past his white patent leather shoes that have a half-inch heel to them. His hair is short and long in all different places. It's really soft to the touch, but it doesn't go past two inches down his neck and it just touches the top of his eye lids. He has on a "Find peace with me or fuck off" wristband I gave him as a graduation present. The band is all black, and the words are carved in a half-inch in white. To finish off his arty look, he has a white beanie on his head.


End file.
